How it all began

     S. and I never thought we would adopt a child. It wasn't until two miscarriages and years of negative pregnancy tests that we considered it an option. It was actually S. who broached the subject. 

   

     "What do you think about adopting?" he asked one morning after yet another single blue line."Look how much we love our cat. Why couldn't we love another human in the same way?" He clinched it with "Maybe we're meant to be parents to a child that doesn't already have them."

     I had to think about it. In my heart, I wanted to be pregnant and deliver. I wanted to be able to look at my child and see my family. I wanted to be able to say "Oh, she gets that from my dad." However, what I wanted most of all was to be a mom. That trumped it.

     I started researching, which is what I always do when faced with something new and scary (it must be the potential lawyer in me.) S. and I both agreed that we wanted a Pakistani baby. It was around April 2010 that I looked into adoption agencies in Pakistan, and found The Edhi Foundation. I called the New York office, and the woman who single-handedly runs the orphanage was there. I talked to her, and she made me feel like I was doing the right thing. I found a good place for getting the homestudy done, and it all started. We went through interviews, medical exams, awkward questions from ill-intentioned people, and spent a ton of money on application fees and other expenses. There was a lot of heartache and tension (for other posts) and lots and lots of sleepless nights. However, it's done. Now, only six months later, S. and I are parents! There's a whole new level of worry and tension now (checking that he's breathing every ten minutes will go away soon, right?) and the sleepless nights continue. But it's worth it. My God, it was worth it all.